Bush-lovers, take heart. Though times at the White House are grim and the fate of your party is bleak, you know something the Democrats don't.
And, boy, when the '08 election comes around, are you really going to stick it to them for it.
Barack Obama, the progressive golden boy who will save the world from the alleged iniquity and tyranny of the Bush-Age (yawn…) has a dark, dirty secret.
He is George W. Bush reincarnate.
We're talking about the mental and spiritual clone of the guy. We're talking about two guys so similar that Barbara's worried she misplaced a son.
We're talking about a country of Christian conservatives and Karl Roves so psyched for a Barack '08 that they've got their Obama buttons pinned and pens poised to vote.
First there's the wilderness-factor. Wanton childhoods of disillusionment and a copious amount of booze can bond even the most disparate members of the human race.
In Bush's own words, he ''kind of floated" around in his youth. He drank a lot of beer, courted a lot of women and generally failed to hold any semblance of an occupation for a good several decades.
But Bush turned 40. He decided to turn his life around.
Then there's Obama. He was a pothead. Should I be more blunt? "When I was a youth, I inhaled," Obama has said.
But Obama turned 20. He decided to turn his life around.
I know, I know. I'm blowing you away. Well, now try this likeness on for size: both men have some serious issues with their fathers.
For Bush, it was that he, though a rich, white leader, could never be a rich, white and successful leader. Indeed, en route to the White House back in '96, he lamented, "Can you imagine how much it hurt to know that Dad's idea of the perfect son was Al Gore?''
Don't cry Bushie. Though Obama didn't have it nearly as bad as you, the senator can at least kind of understand what it's like to grow up in your father's shadow. Forget the racism and cultural alienation Obama had to deal with. This son of a Kenyan had to answer such questions as "Does your dad eat people?"
What unites them more is the "little experience" allegation. People said this of Bush when he ran for president in 2000 and they say it of Obama now. But come on, experience? Who's got the time? For 40-some years Bush had life as a professional partier to maintain—a life made only busier by some noble but, alas, fruitless attempts to start an oil business. Then, hello, he was a governor for a few years.
Obama's record reflects a similar, though not nearly as stellar, lack of experience. He worked as a community organizer in Chicago, practiced as a civil-rights lawyer, taught constitutional law, was a state senator for eight years, a US senator for a few more…
However, I've got some bad news. It's precisely because Obama and Bush seem so similar that makes what I am about to say next very difficult. It's Obama's fault really. If only he hadn't written yet another book and given the country a reason to see how he and Bush may be different after all...
In The Audacity of Hope, Obama wrote, "I am obligated to see the world through George Bush's eyes, no matter how much I may disagree with him. That's what empathy does — it calls us all to task . . . We are all forced beyond our limited vision."
You see the problem, don't you?
Empathy. Obama has it. Bush, well, doesn't. My only guess is that Obama missed the memo that said the very best and most electable leaders are the ones who display qualities of self-righteousness, pig-headedness, and the willingness to only see your side of the facts.
But, Bush-lovers, don't lose hope! Yes, Bush's exit is coming up all too soon. Yes, your list of Republican replacements is regrettable. But though you may not have Barack Obama to count on to save the day…
How about Mike Gravel?
Rosie is devastated about Bush leaving office. Sometimes she weeps. Comfort her at rservis@asu.edu
