Skip to Content, Navigation, or Footer.

Finding Clarity in Parity: How each team can get to the Super Bowl.


What do the participants of the last six Super Bowls have in common? Somehow, they all (Ravens, Giants, Panthers, Bucs, Raiders, Titans, Broncos, Rams twice and Patriots twice) failed to make the playoffs within one year of playing for the NFL title.

When John Elway and Brett Favre faced off in Super Bowl XXXII, who knew Denver and Green Bay would be the last teams to make the playoffs in the seasons both before and after they played in the big game? Call it the ultimate sign of the times; thanks to free agency and the salary cap, no team is safe from suffering a major drop-off after a successful season.

On the flip side, in the new NFL, teams are no longer sentenced to a generation of defeat or rebuilding after suffering through a few losing seasons. The NFL is now a place where every team has at least an outside shot at winning it all. "There's always next year," is no longer a statement made my losers, but by future winners.

Last year, even the Cincinnati Bengals and Dallas Cowboys, two franchises with strong ties to futility this century, were able to ride their new coaches presence to successful seasons. But in the end, it was the Carolina Panthers who were the authoritative surprise team, making an improbable run to the Super Bowl, where they were one Adam Vinatieri yip from winning it all.

So who's it going to be this season? The "experts" seem to be forecasting the Saints, Jaguars, Redskins, and Lions as teams that could inexplicably come from nowhere to snatch the Lombardi trophy from the Patriots' grasp. If you can include those teams in the Super Bowl conversation, then you can include pretty much everyone. So that's what I'm doing for my NFL preview column.

For every NFL team, I'm listing something they must do to have a shot at the Super Bowl - starting with our beloved Arizona Cardinals.

Arizona Cardinals:

Dennis Green should add Josh McCown to the list of quarterbacks he's developed/revitalized in one season or less (think: Daunte Culpepper, Randall Cunningham, Brad Johnson, and even Jeff George).

Early on, there was a lot of optimism towards the Green Era, but that was quickly squashed when the Cardinals began dropping like flies in training camp. It's going to be an especially tough task for Green to help McCown put up big numbers in an offense that has lost its top returning playmakers -- All-Pro receiver Anquan Boldin and their only non-fossilized running back, Marcel Shipp -- to injuries. Unless something crazy happens, it looks like the Cards will spend another year going down more often than a New Jersey governor.

Atlanta Falcons:

Michael Vick must not only stay healthy, but thrive in the newly installed West Coast Offense. Obviously, I could turn this entire column into a "(Insert Superstar) must stay healthy" fest, but this has to be said about Vick more than anyone else. The Falcons have so many weaknesses, and Vick's capable of making up for all of them. Atlanta has no defense, and no playmakers on offense outside of Vick. That's why they went 2-10 while he was hurt last year, then 3-1 when he came back.

Baltimore Ravens:

I hate making him the focal point of the Raven's capsule, but Deion Sanders is a showboat. Jamal Lewis' legal troubles could cast a dark cloud over the late stages of the Ravens' season, but luckily, the camera/headline-hawking Sanders will be around and if there's one thing Sanders can do, it is gravitate the spotlight away from the rest of the team. If Sanders shows he's still a legitimate NFL player at age 37, he'll do just that - take a heat off the Lewis situation.

Buffalo Bills:

The offensive line must protect Drew Bledsoe. He's still a gunslinger when given time in the pocket, but if he takes more shots to the face than Jenna Jameson, this season won't be pretty.

Carolina Panthers:

Like most in the league, the Carolina cornerbacks must adjust to the officials' new emphasis on protecting wide outs. Only Ty Law benefited more than Ricky Manning, Jr. before the five yard jamming rules were accentuated this off season. After having a spectacular postseason assaulting receivers and robbing quarterbacks, Manning will have to figure out some other felonious way to play this year.

Chicago Bears:

The Bears must buy into new coach Lovie Smith's system. In St. Louis, Smith developed a defense that improbably managed to play alongside Mike Martz' maniacal, quick-strike, turnover-prone offense. A similar defense should have no trouble flanking the conservative Bears, who will have an improved running game with the newly-acquired Thomas Jones.

(Editor's Note: Did he just say "Thomas Jones" and "improved running game" in the same sentence? If Perry says it, it must be true. I will wear my Thomas Jones Cardinals jersey to school one of these days and the first person that says "Hey, Ryan Perry said he would improve the Bears' running game, I will give he/she the jersey off my back.)

Cincinnati Bengals:

Carson Palmer must prove he's worthy of starting over Jon Kitna. If Kitna was leading this team, I'm convinced they'd win the division. So Palmer better at least make the playoff or just get hurt really early in the year.

Cleveland Browns:

Jeff Garcia must prove he was the most underrated free agent signing of the off season. Terrell Owens' constant, uncalled for berating and all-around dumbassery marred Garcia's summer, but he handled it like a champ. After not once responding or stooping to Owens' level, you can bet he's itching to make a few statements the way a real football player does: on the field

Dallas Cowboys:

Do you think Jerry Jones and Bill Parcells ever had the following exchange? Bill: Hey, did you pick up those watches we planned on giving the players for completing training camp? Jerry: What watches? Bill: The Fossil watches we talked about last week. Jerry: Oh man, when you said you wanted Fossils for players, I thought you meant something completely different. Bill: So what did you buy? Jerry: Eddie George, Vinny Testaverde, and Keyshawn Johnson...

Obviously, the Cowboys will have to prove their season is more than an open audition for Cialis commercials if they want to get Parcells back to the Super Bowl.

Denver Broncos:

I'm sick of hearing about how a guy with 16 more career interceptions than touchdowns and zero 20 TD seasons is such a dynamic playmaker. The truth is Jake Plummer is a wreckless, mistake-prone quarterback who doesn't fit into the Broncos' ball control structure at all. I'm not worried about the Broncos' running game after losing Clinton Portis -- they could plug Star Jones into their system and she'd gain at least 1,200 yards -- and I'm not worried about their defense, especially after adding Champ Bailey. But I am worried about Plummer scrambling around throwing left-handed passes with his eyes closed, while trying to avoid a sack on first down.

Detroit Lions:

Plain and simple, the Lions' quartet of highly touted youngsters must bring back memories of the Cowboys of the mid-90's. Are Joey Harrington, Kevin Jones, and Roy Williams/Charles Rogers the next Troy Aikman, Emmitt Smith, and Michael Irvin? Probably not, but they'll have to play that way if they want to go anywhere

Green Bay Packers:

The Packers must realize Ahman Green is their best offensive weapon. Sure, we all know it's Brett Favre's team, but Green is one of the five most effective offensive players in the league. Blame it on the fact that he's overshadowed by Favre, a near God in NFL lore, or the fact that the NFL is crotch deep in talented running backs... but for a guy who scored more touchdowns than EVERY player in the league not named Priest Holmes last season, he rarely gets the recognition he deserves.

Houston Texans:

Does anyone else still not consider this franchise a part of the NFL? They're struggling to fit my criteria. They never make any big off season moves, no one on their team has ever murdered anyone, and their moniker is the most unoriginal, redundant thing I've ever heard in my life. Seriously, we know what state Houston is in. And a picture of a cow's head is about the least-daunting logo they could have come up with. I'm not getting off their back until the Portland Oregonians unveil a pink hamster logo in 2010. Anyway, going into their third season, it still feels like the Texans are some sort of traveling novelty act. Therefore, I refuse to write a capsule about their Super Bowl chances. Real NFL teams only.

Indianapolis Colts:

Remember last year, when Peyton Manning lit the league up en route to the MVP Award and the biggest contract in NFL history? Well, both Marvin Harrison and Edgerrin James are in contract years. They'll both need to put together seasons similar to Peyton's if they want the big money... and if the Colts want to finally beat the Patriots.

Jacksonville Jaguars:

The Jags must put a strong emphasis on utilizing their first round pick, wide receiver Reggie Williams. Say what you want about combines, individual workouts, and 40 yard dash times... Williams spent his college career torching future NFL defensive backs in the Pac-Ten. Just ask Washington State fans, who watched Williams pull in 11 balls for 203 yards as a freshman in 2001. In that game, he caught passes over cornerbacks Jason David and Marcus Trufant and safety Lamont Thompson... all of whom started last week in the NFL. Plus, he's on four of my seven fantasy teams, and in two leagues I took him when Larry Fitzgerald was still on the board. So they should definitely use him a lot, so I can win and look smart.

Kansas City Chiefs:

The Chiefs must prove they did the right thing by bringing in defensive coordinator Gunther Cunningham rather than making any personnel changes to their horrible defense. Otherwise, they'll go down as one of the most explosive offensive units never to win a Super Bowl.

Miami Dolphins:

A defense like theirs must be accompanied by a dominant running game, and this team's running game isn't coming back anytime soon. For a comeback, they'd need to start passing a bong around the huddle.

Analysts keep saying the Dolphins haven't recovered mentally from Ricky Williams' sudden departure. They can't fall into a Ricky-like depression if they want to have a successful season. If coach Dave Wannstedt resorts to slipping Prozac into the team's Gatorade, that's probably not a good sign.

Minnesota Vikings:

Last year, the Vikings started 6-0... and still managed to miss the playoffs. While they have plenty of guys who put up big numbers and lead by example (Randy & Daunte), someone has to step into the verbal leadership role for Minnesota if they want to avoid another late season swoon.

New England Patriots:

Bill Belichick must remain on the sideline through sickness and in health... and even if he dies, they should still probably roll his cadaver out there for intimidation/inspirational/gross out purposes. Say what you want about the Patriots' loaded roster -- which only got better in the off season -- this team would never be talking "dynasty" if it weren't for Belichick. It's Belichick who puts the brilliant defensive schemes together that deconstruct "unstoppable" offenses like the Rams in the 2002 Super Bowl, and it was Belichick who replaced a healthy Drew Bledsoe that same year for 199th overall draft pick Tom Brady. That bold, harshly-criticized move seems to have worked out pretty well.

New Orleans Saints:

I'm not buying into all of the Saints hype. They virtually have the same mediocre personnel they did the past few mediocre seasons with the same mediocre coach calling the same mediocre plays. Which means if these guys are going to the Super Bowl, Jim Haslett must have realized his team was under-achieving and attended a few motivation seminars this off season. That, or Aaron Brooks is going to have to throw 80 touchdown passes. But if he only throws 79, they're screwed, because in the age of parity, you can't expect an organization to stay the same on the field and improve in the standings. Especially in a division that has the last two NFC Super Bowl reps.

New York Giants:

I hear Kurt Warner's tight with Jesus. Maybe they can work something out.

New York Jets:

It amazes me how quickly people have forgotten about Chad Pennington and the season he had when he was healthy two years ago. If he can return to 2002 form, and Curtis Martin can come even close to his 1500 yard prediction, you can bet Herm Edwards will have this team going in the right direction.

Oakland Raiders:

See above. Replace Pennington with Rich Gannon. Make sure Jerry Rice doesn't die on the field.

Philadelphia Eagles:

Surrounded by players who actually encourage his loud-mouthed ways, and a coach who at this point doesn't care about anything but winning an NFC Championship, Terrell Owens will likely put up the best numbers of his career. (would also mention TO being the best acquisition in the NFL this season) Especially since he thrives when paired with mobile quarterbacks (Young, Garcia). Considering the Eagles didn't have a single receiver catch more than three TDs last year, all Owens has to do is show up and this team is infinitely better. If the Eagles remain healthy, they'll get the job done. WOULD MENTION THAT DONOVAN MCNABB IS THE GOLDEN CHILD THAT WILL TAKE THEM TO SUPERBOWL THIS YEAR.

Pittsburgh Steelers:

If you haven't noticed already, the amount of spit emitted from Bill Cowher's face while he's yelling on the sideline is directly proportional to the team's number in the loss column. If he can limit the amount of saliva he sprays to roughly four gallons per week, Steelers fans could be in store for a magical season. (ROETHLISBERGER)

(DUCE STALEY)

San Diego Chargers:

Is it too much to ask of LaDainian Tomlinson to touch the ball on every offensive play this year? Even that might not be enough... do you think he's interested in playing any cornerback?

San Francisco 49ers:

More than a year later, I'm still trying to figure out the Dennis Erickson hiring. The only conclusion I can come up with? He has access to a time machine, and the Niners plan on using it to bring back Montana, Rice, and Lott in their respective primes. If so, the Niners have an excellent chance at postseason glory. If not, they better start snatching up some Mel Kiper Jr.'s magazines.

Seattle Seahawks:

The Seattle receivers must catch the football better than they did last season. This team reminds me so much of the Eagles of the last three years, it's scary. They're solid everywhere on the field, except receiver. Darrell Jackson and Koren Robinson have all the talent in the world, but have yet to prove they can catch more than a cold. It would be considerate of them to do that sometime soon, considering that's the sole reason Paul Allen's paying them millions of dollars.

St. Louis Rams:

Mike Martz is often considered an offensive guru, but he always seems to go through those "Marshall Faulk is the most versatile back in the NFL, I'm a glory hog and would hate for someone to think he's the reason my team scores so many points, let's throw on 35 straight plays" phases at all the wrong times (see: Super Bowl vs. the Pats). If he wants to go to the Super Bowl, all he has to do is allow Faulk and rookie Stephen Jackson to show the Rams have the most dominant running game in the NFL. 2500 yards between them isn't out of the question, especially with a fresh Faulk handling less of a load every Sunday.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers:

I'll be honest; the Bucs confuse the hell out of me. On the one hand, they dropped John Lynch and Warren Sapp this off season, getting rid of two guys who were on the down slope of their respective careers, but hadn't yet suffered a noticeable drop-off in productivity. It's always a clutch move when you can hold on to a guy for the entire productive portion of his career, then dump him before the messy, inevitable "I've given this organization so much, now I expect you to overpay me by 400% even though I'm completely useless" situation arises (see: Eddie George in Tennessee).

So what I don't understand is why they'd drop those fresh corpses, then go out and sign 100-year old Tim Brown, 32-year old and coming off knee surgery Charlie Garner, and Joey Galloway, who caught 34 passes last year and has lived up to his ridiculous "big play" reputation by averaging 2.6 touchdowns a year since 1998. For the Bucs to be successful, three guys who are obviously past their primes will have to prove that they're not.

Tennessee Titans:

If Steve McNair can win co-MVP with nothing but duct tape holding him together, can you imagine what he would do if he ever had a healthy season? Actually, I think he's got that Iverson-like quality where he plays 20 times better when he's wincing in pain. It's like he'd be better off if he amputated a foot or something. Yeah, that's what I'm going with. The Titans will win the Super Bowl if McNair loses his right foot in a wood chipper. You heard it here first.

Washington Redskins:

When Olandis Gary and Mike Anderson run for five million miles a game, you have to be leery of whether it's the players or the system that's responsible for the huge numbers. Such is the case with Clinton Portis, who the Redskins acquired this off season from the run-hearty Broncos in exchange for maybe the best cornerback in the league, Champ Bailey. If you ask me, it's not going to be easy with a strong downgrade in offensive lines, but if Portis can prove he's worth the trade and his new $50 million contract, Joe Gibbs has an outside shot at sizing up his fourth Super Bowl ring.

My Official Postseason Picks:

NFC Championship Game: Seahawks beat T.O. and the Eagles 34-27 in a delayed retaliation for the Sharpie incident.

AFC Championship: Chiefs outscore the Patriots in a shootout, 44-38.

Super Bowl: Seahawks thrash the Chiefs 35-14, giving Dick Vermeil a real reason to cry.

Ryan Perry is a freelance web journalist based in Tempe. His No Blood, No Foul column is exclusive to the Web Devil, and he can be reached at ryanperry@gmail.com.


Continue supporting student journalism and donate to The State Press today.

Subscribe to Pressing Matters



×

Notice

This website uses cookies to make your experience better and easier. By using this website you consent to our use of cookies. For more information, please see our Cookie Policy.